In the room where I sleep … my thoughts overflow.

Posts tagged ‘New Years’

New Year Resolutions With More Scars, Nudity, and Hopefully making friends at AA!!!

That was last year….and I totally rocked it out!! Like totally. Sadly I don’t have any tattoos or piercings or scars to commemorate this past year. Fuck I should have thought of that before Sunday!! I could have lit my self on fire or something. I did have a couple of close calls while making pizza!!

I already posted my first and foremost resolution that is  important to me.  I thought, I need more. What’s better than self disappointment on December 31st of 2012!!!

If there is even a December 2012. Finger crossed!!

I read all these resolution list of people who now feel resolutions are so passé.

Fuck you!!

I am uncool and will be uncool til the day I die! I will continue to do resolutions til the die!

Not keeping promises is the American way!

So to begin…. music!!

Resolution 2. I Need More Scars

Scars from the year to show that I am actually doing something. I need to start jumping off buildings, getting dirty, I need a damn neck brace!!

Resolution 3.  I will try to be active everyday even if its one activity.

I am gonna go balls to the wall with this. Yesterday I rode a bike. Today I will jump on the trampoline. Tomorrow I will smash glasses with a practiced high kick. It will be glorious.

Resolution 4. I am going to try to wake up …. (say it, say it Marina!!) earlier.

God, I hate waking up. God I hate waking up early. It’s always in the morning do I wish I was dead!! Cause then I could sleep!!!

But I need to wake up early. Part of my stress is being fucking late everywhere. Seriously, how do you other grown ups do it?

I try going to bed early, but I can’t shut down.  And even if I get proper sleep, I can’t remember why I have to wake up in morning!!

I don’t remember work or getting my daughter to school. I can’t compute. So nothing is important in the morning.

I lost the getting up battle today, but I will try again.

I need a wake up service in my room. I need someone’s annoying voice to bug me at 6:15am in the morning.

What is my mother doing around that time??

Resolution 5.  I am going to drink more. Seriously. I need to drink… and more often. My life is getting faster and faster and stressful… I need to work on my vices and fixes.

I am envious of those who tweet that are a  enjoying a nice vodka and cranberry. I figure that if I can start I might be able to handle the step son when he comes over and STAYS for 17 days straight.

I could have used alcohol the entire holidays!!

Also, if I get drunk periodically throughout the year, I will thus create a resolution for next year on attending AA regularly.I know I will totally score loads of friends there.

Resolution 6. More nudity.

Seriously. I need to make a day outta the month that I can just get naked. Not for sexually purposes but to air creases, to appreciate the nice cotton in my bed sheets and the leather on my couches. I think my husband and I can both agree that finding crumbs on each others’ bodies during sex is  bonus features that you never stop loving.

Sex and a snack!

Great!!!

Also, I plan to read more, work harder, learn something different more often, be more open minded about things.   and a bunch of other crap …. etc etc…

So there you have it… my resolution list!!

Easy enough to make, easy enough to break…. all in the American Spirit!

Happy New Year and May It Be a Happy New Year

I never thought about New Years Resolutions…. but this year I am thinking of them. I think of all the things I want to do or wanna be. And then I start thinking, well why I haven’t I?

Am I really waiting for the January 1st to start anything?

Honestly I am. I want to begin with the new year. A fresh start, a fresh new way of thinking. Lately there have been many sad thoughts. These days feel like they are passing fast, to fast. The feeling scares me. It felt like it too so long to get here and now, I worry that there isn’t enough time.

Resolution #1. Make time.

I need to make time. There will always be dishes, laundry, a house to clean, etc etc. When I step outside myself, I see my kids waiting there patiently for me. Waiting for me to sit down and play with them, listen to them, read to them, and really do anything with them. And I am doing everything like a mad woman trying to get everything done.

Its just not possible. And even if it is … at what cost.

My little boy turned 3 yesterday.

Gone are the infant years, the baby steps, the first words.

He is a little boy and getting bigger everyday. I need to start cherishing these moments. Cherish these like they were the last.

Its not just my kids. It my parents too. How long do I have with them? I used to think en eternity. Sometimes when I see my parents especially my dad, it makes me cry. I see the lines in his face, the gray hair, the tiredness. When did that happen?

For years, my parents looked the exact same. And then some time when I was growing up, getting married, having babies I looked at them and they were different. I love my dad and mother so much. I worry about them.

I need to call more. Go over more. Take time to just do things for them in any way I can. I want them to know that I love them. That they mean the world to me…. and for me, they were the best parents.

I think of my husband. I think of all the ways I can be a better wife, friend. I need to always try to improve, to communicate, and be sensitive. I need to be outside my self and look at the ways I am with him and to him.

I love my family. I need to focus on that. I need to extend not only to my family but those that I call friends at all. I need to let them know, show them, that I actually think of them. They are in my thoughts.

So my focus is outward…. I wanna be a great person. I wanna be a better for others.

Plus I can’t write that I wanna start exercising… cause they will mean I will actually have to start doing that!!

 

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