1. Do you like purple dinosaurs: Of course… especially the ones that sing and laugh all retardedly. They entertain my kids for hours!
2. What’s kind of sneakers you got: Nike Shoxs… is that what they are called?? (shrugs)
3. How smart are you from 1-10: On a good day a 7; on a bad day a 3
4. Name a word with 2 or more meanings: uhhhhhhhh shit.
5. If i gave you a million bucks, what would you buy first: A huge ass house
6. Watch u gonna do with all that junk?: You are an amateur… I’m obviously gonna get you drunk on my hump … my lovely lady lumps
7. Whos better lil Wayne, drake, kanye west, Rick ross, or Justin bieber: Damnit! I am going with Kanye. This is wrong isn’t it?
8. Name something you would never say to your mom : Woman go make me a sandwich now!
9. Would you rather be able to teleport, fly, read minds,invisible, or move things with finger: WTF all of the above! How can you teleport and not fly? Some people ….
10. Who is the best actor or actress: Actress- I like Sandra Bullock but honestly the correct answer are the ones that are willing to take off their clothes; Actor: the ones that marry non celebrity moms that live in El Paso TX
11. Who were you with last night: Who is asking this? My husband? JK … I was with my amigos (da kids)
12.What woke you up this morning: The fucking Sun… bastard!
13. Is tonight going to be a good night: Why yes it is!!! Tomorrow I don’t work … so hells yea!!
14. What’s on your mind RIGHT now: Food … thats always on my mind
15. Would you take a bullet for anyone: Yea def for my hubby and kids
16. Do you listen 2 music everyday: Is a witches tit hot? I just found this morning… they are for some reason.
17. What is your favorite kind of soda: Coke … I’m pretty basic.
18. How long til your b-day: 3 months but who’s counting
19. Does a kiss make you feel better: Of course…. but in certain places. (comedic drum roll)
20. Do you start the water before you get in the shower: Of course, my water gots to prepare itself for me
21. Have you ever had stitches: Nope I am accident prone but not enough for the ER
22. What are you doing tomorrow: Eating and sleeping
23. What is your favorite cereal: Golden Grahams
24. Funniest thing you heard all day: This tweet: The only pick-up line you need when hitting on fat girls is “Do you suck dick? If not please don’t waste my time.”
25. Do you snore: I don’t think so…
26. What was the last thing you had to drink: I had the morning alcohol … gasoline coffee
27. What is your favorite kind of soup: Tortilla …
28. Taco sauce- Hot, Medium, or Mild: Hot yo with a big glass of water!
29. Have you ever used someone else’s toothbrush: Yes… as long as I don’t think about it too much I am ok
30. Would you rather get up early or sleep in: Sleep in
31. Who would you want to be stuck in a cave with: 1. My husband but if he is unavailable Bear Grylls.. I wanna live damnit!
32. Look to your left, what do you see: Maps
33. Four words to explain why you last threw up? Fucken Chinese Didn’t Cook (right)
34. Favorite cuss word: Fuck
35. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?My bosses … they are all golfing together
36. Do you laugh at people with “bowl” haircuts? Fuck yea… those people are tards!!
37. What would you Do if rudolph the red nosed reigndeer showed up in ur yard? “Vern get my gun, I got dinner tonight! Yee haw”
38. do you agree that penguins are AWESOME!!! ? I totally do!
39. Do you actually believe Alaska is covered in snow? Yes… wait is this a Palin trick question?
40. Do you believe in unicorns? Yes. Unicorns are magically
41. Do you think people who spend a lot of time online are time-wasters? What the fuck did you call me?
42. If you had a new identity, who would you be? I would be Kim Kardashian… I would probably molest myself all the time.
43. Thoughts on Taylor Swift: She is cute. Taylor, you better not turn into a ho!
44. Thoughts on bitches: Well where they at???
45. Did you lie on this questionnaire? Unquestionably