In the room where I sleep … my thoughts overflow.

Archive for the ‘Feelings’ Category

29 and Deep Fried

This past Sunday was my birthday. I turned 29 years old.

Weird.

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Who imagines being alive this long? Surely I would have been killed in a traffic accident or something gang related, but no I am still here … turning 29 years old.  I am scared to get older… who isn’t? However I think I am more in shock. Wasn’t I just 16 years old like yesterday? Wasn’t turning 21 while breast-feeding still like an hour ago?

Time has passed before my very eyes… and I now have been  alive 29 years. What the….

The shock has not subsided.

So…. I didn’t do anything to celebrate my birthday. I couldn’t.

Friday I went into panic year before 30 years old panic. I went to the store and bought all these facial creme and washes because if I am going to turn 29 years old I am going to damn well look at least 26! I was gone ho to start taking care of my skin, use the appropriate aging products and all that jazz.

I applied it Friday night, Saturday morning, then spent all afternoon  in the sun. And my facial wash and creme baked on my face  BURNING THE SHIT OUT OF MY FACE especially MY EYE LIDS! My eyelids were dark, wrinkled and puffy.

I aged 70 years  over night. Or got in a fight or cried my eyes out.

I was hideous! There was no way in hell I was going anywhere. And the whole situation made  me more mopey and depressed. I was so sad.

My hubby promised to make it all up to me next weekend, when I won’t look like a deep-fried chick.

Truth is, I don’t feel any different.  In my mind I am still 19. I will probably forever feel 19. The physical part is changing…. and I am trying to will it as much as I can. I honestly want to be fine with getting older but who knows when I will come to terms with it. Once being young is done, its done.

All I ask now is that convenience store clerk card… card the shit outta me please!!

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Happy Birthday My Little Princess

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Today my little baby girl, Sienna O’ren Sanchez is 6.

At 5, you learned to tie your own shoe. You refused for me to make your lunch and just let me suggest and supervise what you put in your lunch box. You became grandpa’s nurse, grandma’s best match, the neutral and judge free person of the chaos of kids in the house.

You stand before bullies unafraid.  You aren’t afraid to state your opinion. You are daddy’s little girl but because you and I are so the same. You are strong physically and mentally. You are the only kid I know that can do 25 push-ups correctly. You are so helpful, so full of common sense that you wow me. You are a hard worker and extremely smart.

You smell like sweet bread all the time. The blankie we call Pillow that you carry around and sucking your thumb remind us that you are still very little, and give us glimpses that you are still out sweet baby girl. I love how you demand your naps, you are my movie buddy and your fierceness is something even I can envy.

I don’t know where you came from… well I know but what I am referring to is your spirit. You are only 6 but you have done, said and become so much. You are a born leader but you are kind sweet and extremely strong.

The truth is there will never be another girl like you. Never! You are so special and so rare. You are the love of my life. You are loved and cherished by your daddy, uncles, aunts, grandma, grandpas, friends, brothers, sister and so much by me. I met you first! Don’t forget!

I love you princess. Don’t change!  Keep marching to the beat of your own drum.

I love always and forever. For as long as I am living my baby you will be!

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My Favorite Movies That YOU NEED To Watch

Now that football is over I bet you freaking out. Yeah, I can just see you now: hyperventilating.  You could watch college basketball but who has time for that?

Right now I am in television limbo. All my shows have just finished and I am currently waiting for shows to start. Walking Dead is set to start in 5 days. So what must I do til then?

Clean? What are you drunk? Start on my Pinterest ideas?? Hahahahaha, you are killing me.

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You need to  join me on my couch. I will share with you the movies that bring great joy. Let me educate you.  Just bring your own popcorn.

Movies You Should See #1

Love Actually

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How have you not seen this movie?? It the greatest movie for love ever!! Normally I am not a sappy chick flick romance movie type of person. I am probably the only woman on earth who refuses to see The Notebook because I am afraid of the disgusting feelings I might feel. However, if you can add some comedy quirkiness, well then I am down! This movie is smart, funny, and leaves you feeling good. Drunk good! Not the running through hills singing The Hills are Alive good. That’s just gross.

Movies You Should See #2

All the Rocky Movies

Every time they are showing on tv I can’t help but watch. It’s just a really really good  college of movies.  I wouldn’t really call inspirational because  I have yet felt the desire to start boxing. Its a great story. The characters in the story are great, the plot is timeless, Sylvester Stallone isn’t bad to look at it either.

Movies You Should See #3

Horrible Bosses

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I love this movie. These guys have to be the dumbest guys on Earth but it works. They are hilarious! I recently discovered there is an art to talking dirty and Jason Sudeikis’s character nailed it!  It has the same off to wall feeling as The Hangover. I can’t say it enough… I love it I love it I love it!

Movies You Should See #4

Face Off

I like the movie a lot. Maybe more then I should. Something about Nicolas Cage being this crazed psychotic bad guy is just so…. hot. I see this movie on the regular. You can’t beat action and suspense.

Movies You Should See #5

The Silence of Lambs

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Of course this movie is great. I am sure most people will agree with me. The thing that strikes me with it is probably at the time it came out, it was the first of it nature. It was dark, gritty, and we were  exposed to things we hadn’t seen before. This was because there were A type actors in this movie. We HAD to see this movie. And even after all these years, it still leaves me with the same creeped out feeling I got when I first saw it. Plus, I feel like I am missing something. That is why I re-watch it so much. I feel like the need to understand something about it. Something that I just don’t get. However, its the grittiness, the dark side that I just don’t understand. And yet, I will still watch it.

Are there any movies that make your list??

I Don’t Care How You Get Here- Just Get Here!!

I stopped writing on here for lack of …. “time”.  It still surprised me that people were visiting my site!

Go home people you are drunk!

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Just playing.

Stay.

Truth is I don’t even care how you get here either.  All that matters is that you are here.  And let me tell you, how you guys get here…. its kinda weird.

Most popular searches that lead people to my blog in 2012 to the present?

Huge Boobs

I hope there was enough for you here. Not from me, but from others. I suffer from the lack thereof! We are still working on a cure. But seriously, I hope you had more boobs then you can handle. That may be a good resolution for all. Get your daily dose of huge boobs. Squeeze a friend!

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Eat the Rich

No, don’t so that. Most of them are just skin and bones. Unless you are trapped on Mount Everest or the desert and it seems like the only way. Eating leaves and ants is for pussies anyways.

I had a lot of Fuck Mondays and Tuesdays Suck .

Come on people, if it ain’t Friday it just isn’t cool.

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Praise Jesus, he is Mexican

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Come one white people. Let us have this!

Ryan Reynold’s Bike

Really? That got your here? Ok ok no judgement.

Lucky bike. That’s all I am saying.

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I’m totally not looking at the bike!

A Petition For Your Help- Save the Biebs

People of the world,

I write today to urge, to plead with you in helping me save Justin Bieber.  If you not aware, a recent attempt on his life was foiled by police. A convicted felon and his nephew plotted to kidnap, torture, castrate and finally kill Justin Bieber.  The evil men intended to have the kidnapping take place in late November as Justin played two sold-out shows at New Your City‘s Madison Square Garden.

That is too close for comfort people!! Justin Bieber is a national treasure and he is very cute. Perhaps when he was younger he was a bit annoying to some. However now that he is legal ….  grown up and matured he has really crossed barriers and made a mark on our culture. Did I mention he is cute?

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Can you imagine this young cutie hurt? I can’t. I didn’t even like the mock beating he received in one of his recent music videos!! Honestly, he is just a kid. Who would want to hurt a kid?? A very cute kid who is legal and very cute and also very legal. Did I mention he was legal?
And also, I have a big problem with someone who wants to destroy all the little Bieber babies Justin may make one day?? I want my children’s children’s children to enjoy the fruits from Justin’s loins for as long as they can be…. er … fruitful. May the fruit be bountiful!!
So today I am asking that at the end this post, you leave a comment in your protest that we need a better way to preserve Justin, our dancing singing treasure. I feel that the only way to justify this horrific situation is that President Obama send some secret service to protect Justin Bieber.  We need some gentlemen with the mentality that they may need to take a bullet, or a castration for the Biebs.  In this way they will be doing their country a big honor!
I know that some may be feel a bit skeptical seeing how Justin wears his pants…
justin-bieber-2012-victoria-s-secret-fashion-show-inside-31but perhaps we can get the secret service to help with that matter too.
Again, thank you for your time and interest in something that is very dear to my heart. Oh yea and for my 7-year-old daughter as well. She would “just die” if something happened to him.  And remember Justin IS   legal!
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Thank you,
Marina Sleeps

My Life in 300 Words or Less

This is not going to about the election, who to vote for, or who I am voting for or whatever.

I know how I feel and that’s all I care about.

Plus it gets annoying.  Annoying is the people who swear the world is going to end if Obama wins. Shut the fuck up people. Tomorrow the sun will rise as it will the next day, the next day, and the next day.
And it doesn’t even matter you guys, the world is gonna end on December 21st anyway. Vote Mayan!!!

So back to what I originally was gonna post … I darn near forgot!

So here are something I have been thinking about in bullet point form. Feel free to discuss our organized and professional I am amongst yourselves.

  • It sucks to not have TV!! We have to wait a whole week for them to come out and align us with the sun or something like that. So I am depressed. I am missing my shows, football, my kids watching their cartoons and following me around asking for everything!  DIRECTV you have failed me!!!
  • Stop talking about the Walking Dead… I missed it!! God damn you Americans!!!
  • I may have to start clipping coupons. I need to save money. That or get a second job. Is anyone hiring?
  • Greatest singer ever: R Kelly. That guy can sing about anything. Sex, love, closets. Food for thought people.
  • Speaking of food…. I wish I had tamales.
  • I won tickets on my local and favorite radio show to go see Eddie Vedder!!! Yep Eddie Vedder… the singer of Pearl Jam. However, there is no Pearl Jam band anymore. It’s just Eddie Vedder with a ukulele. Hmmmm, unsure about this.

 

So there you have it. My life in 300 words or less.

28 Years Later-This is Me

Tomorrow I am 28 years old.

Who knew I would have lived to be a quarter of a century and then some?

Am I surprised? A little. A palm reader told me I would die in a car crash but she assured me I wouldn’t see it coming or feel any pain. It will be instant. I would be too busy listening to music.

That may or may not be the truth but I am totally cool with it happening that way. As long as no one is with me at the time, I am totally cool!

I won’t kid you, the older I get, the more anxious I get. It’s scary getting old. Somehow your whole being becomes a battle field. In your mind, you can still do things as you were able to when you were much younger. However, your body disagrees. I am trying to stay busy and active and at the end of the day I am shocked that my body is rebelling.

I can’t say that I am fully accepting getting older because I haven’t.

What I will say is I do feel wiser. Not wise just wiser. And honestly this is the first time I am feeling this.

Lately I feel like I have been challenged based on what I know or what I believe.  I am also surprised by my answers.

Here is what I learned:

Don’t rule out people completely. They may surprise you.

It’s not that I’m negative nor am I a pity party but I am not used to people doing anything for me. I don’t expect anything from anyway. That’s just the way I am. I am always the giver. I love being the giver.  However, I have learned how to recently receive. Not just in material things but the kindness of people is so overwhelming. I can’t believe I am being thought of.

Practice patience.

I am still learning this one. I am not a perfectionist by far but I love things to be perfect. For instance, I NEED to have the house cleaned, dinner hot and ready when my hubby comes home. I am psycho like that. I want things to always be perfect for him. Always. It stresses me out when they aren’t.  Yet, I need to understand that not everyone is on my time-table. Patience with the little people, I say to myself.

I also need to be patient with my children. Especially with them. I am so busy trying to make everything perfect I don’t stop and just patiently listen to them, patiently let them do something, and patiently let them be kids. Patience is teaching me to not worry so much about the people I don’t want them to be and actually start concentrating on the people that they are.

Let Loose.

I seriously need to drink more. I need to have fun. My life is fleeting. Pretty soon I will just have memories and I need to entertain my grandchildren with something.

Accepting Myself

Since I was younger, I was always being concerned with being liked, with being a nice person. I would take it to heart when someone would say something against me or if someone didn’t like me. I am always paranoid about that.

Why?

Because I wanted to just be this great person.

Little do I do that I am actually doing it.

This is who I am now. I need to accept this is me. I am nice enough. I am good enough. The good person that I was always striving to be exists in me. I am already there. If I stay on this path, I can’t lose.

I am sure there is more that I have learned but this is what I have been thinking of lately.

I can be cool with getting older because that’s just another journey. And who is up for another adventure?!

If it doesn’t work out, I will just move to Montana, find a secluded cabin in the woods, and maybe kick the bucket fighting off a bear Legend of the Fall style!!

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