This weekend I became one…. with the TV. We got immensely close. I was glad to get back in the saddle with my ole buddy. Everyone knows the best source of news is through TV. Duh!
Over this weekend, I am sure some important stuff happened. Something like Octomom is attempting porn…. oh excuse me…. got a little vomit in my mouth.
However, I want to get the hard-hitting news. The issues that weigh on the minds of Americans. The situation at hand.
I am talking about Rhianna …. on Saturday Night Live.
Rhianna was Saturday Night Live’s musical guest this past Saturday. She covered three songs, Birthday Cake, Talk the Talk, and finally Where Have You Been.
Reviews for her performance have been shockingly great. S2S magazine said “Rhianna ruled the stage” and described her performances as “epic“.
Really? Epic??? I was thinking more on the lines of…. “In badly need of itch cream.”
Let me know what you think
I seriously caught like 6 pattings of the nether regions. If she wasn’t patting it, she was referencing the area pretty dramatically. Her arms and hands were so awkward that I honestly didn’t pay attention to her actual performance. So it could have been epic… who knows!!!
I came up with a few reasons why Rhianna kept patting herself.
- She forgot her to apply her “cream”.
- She was reminding us all what it was.
- Michael Jackson’s anniversary of death is next month. Possible homage to the Prince?
- Possibility of it jumping off and running away.
- She left her special conditioner on a little too long.
- She let Kourtney Kardashian wax her.
- She working on a new wrestling move
- It wasn’t a suggestion but rather an invite.
- Crabs crabs and more crabs.
Either way, Rhianna needs to get that checked. You never mess around with a situation down there.
You may return to your FOX news and Antique Roadshow.