In the room where I sleep … my thoughts overflow.

I have let my spam accumulate more so I take a closer look who are these people and why are they writing. For the most part I am getting a bunch of foreigners with foreign language. And it’s not the cool foreigners like Raj.

For one thing they leave all this jibberish and then expect me to click the link. Uhhhhhh no.

Not gonna happen. I wasn’t born yesterday. I was born in ’84, the year of Big Brother.

Then I got this one:

Marina Sleeps’s Blog I was recommended this blog by my cousin. I am not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such detailed about my problem. You’re wonderful! Thanks! your article about I’m just a poster of a girl. Marina Sleeps’s BlogBest Regards Nick

First dude, do you remember passing English?? There is a system of writing. Not smooshing shit together.

Next, HOW DARE YOU!??!!

First, you say your cousin referred you to this blog. And then you say you don’t know if your GUY cousin is writing this blog. Do I look like a guy to you? Does this blog need more vagina? Wait, that wouldn’t… fix the problem huh?

Ok. Do I need to add more tampon pics and talk more about my period? The tenderness in my breasts? Yeast infection medication?

I don’t think I can be anymore clearer. I am woman.

All woman.

Woman like this… well less model and not so much extra frontal plumpness …. we have the same hair!!

No, that isn’t right. The point is I am woman. We have the same bits and pieces. More or less.

Then I had some girl spammer out of nowhere as me for my advice. Screw that it nothing to do with blog. All she knew was that she needed help asap!

Jen asked, ” What sex toy should I get my boyfriend?”

Ummmm, I don’t know. Anal beads? I don’t even think you have to actually buy beads, Jen. If you are tight with money, you could use your pearls. Of course don’t forget to wash them.

Again, I got another spam comment with links to male enhancement stuff. I am now getting confused. I am starting to worry if maybe I need them after all.  I have no enhancement whatsoever.

Do you know how people have been finding my blog? With shit like this:

i’ve been feeling sick after taking my zoloft

Then stop taking zoloft!!

I mean I know I am not a doctor. I am not even a good street doctor. But common sense should tell you… STOP!

happy birthday you dirty mexican

Hold on let me get the shot-gun…. (loads, pumps), now please google it again!

secretary kills her boss

Whoa! Whoa! I never said that…. sure sometimes I wanna be able to pause life and punch my boss in the face but kill…. god no. Do you know what they would do TO me in prison?

They aren’t brushing other girls’ hair in there and having pillow fights.

DO NOT TIE ME TO THIS.

AGAIN!! DO NOT CLICK THIS PAGE.

Don’t you guys watch CSI??

I am Mexican. They probably won’t even give me a trial!!

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Comments on: "Spammers: You Suck. The End" (4)

  1. iamnotshe said:

    Honey, you are F U N N Y! Weird shit shows up at your blog. That is so bizzarre when people say they LOVE you when you’re like, ERM, who the eff are you? Too funny. Oh … and how do some girls get that frontal plumpness without paying. Think i got my answer. JEESH! xo melissa

    • I have a bit of OCD so it was killing holding onto all that spam. Yet it was worth it to write a blog about it. Yes, I promptly erased it all!

  2. Love the blog! Spam got me thinking, what do you need to keep spammers away? Spam-a-way! For 19.99 (plus separate processing and handling) you can be spam free! Not only that if you order now we’ll send you an extra large fleece blanket and our free monogramed coasters! Act now though, supplies are limited. Zombies are waiting to take your call (and steal your identity).

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