In the room where I sleep … my thoughts overflow.

I had a funny conversation the other day with my good friend Velvet Bunny. And yes that is her stripper name.

Any how… it went from a regular old conversation to something weird. In other words… friends please don’t let you friends text!

Me: Dude traffic sucks.

VB:  Ha ha that was an unexpected text.

Me:  Well I was thinking about you.

VB: Do you dream about me too?

Me: Yes. The latest one was of you and the smurffs. You guys had a potluck.

VB: Ha Ha did you read my email today?

Me:  Yes though I was not able to comment back cause I got a virus on my computer at work… but dude!!! That was freaking interesting. Where did you find that?

VB: I heard about it on a podcast I listen too. So when I got home first thing I did was look for it.

Me: At least I know how to keep it tidy if I ever became a dude.

VB: Or if we want to visually make it look bigger

Me: I think if I ever became a dude… its gonna be small no matter what I do.

Me: But its the motion of the ocean that counts

VB: Thats why strap ons were invented

Me: Really is that why?

VB: It could be a good reason I think

Me: I hope my penis is fat. Thats all I ask.

Me: I may have to look into the strap on business

VB: Ha ha. Ok you do that.

Me: I will… I might come back as a man after I die. Groan that would be the worst…. do you think I’ll still like dudes??

VB: I don’t think you’ll like guys anymore. I was told that I was a man in my past life by a palm reader :p

Me: Are you serious?? So do like girls or dudes? Thats an important question I think…

VB: In this life I like men. In my past life she said I was a rich asshole who had lots of women

Me: I wanna be the old you!!

Me: I mean you are fine now but lets be honest… if I come back as a guy I wanna have woman for all the wrong reasons

VB: Yeah I want to be my old self also. But I’m suppose to learn what being a female is like in this life so I can better myself spiritually

Me: If you ever return as your old life… don’t apply what you learned as a woman. No one likes a pussy!

VB: Ha ha ha yeah I know but I have to learn something about being a woman in this life and who knows what I’ll be in the next. Hopefully no sex just rich.

Me:  No sex?! I rather die!

VB: Yeah I’d be like an angel or something neither male or female sex organs imagine no drama no periods no bullshit

Me: No periods!!! I can imagine that… the world would finally have peace.

VB: You almost home?

She was probably annoyed by me now…. See… I am letting you confiscate my cell now.


Comments on: "Friends don’t let Friends Text… unless its funny" (18)

  1. firecracker3 said:

    I love text convos like this!

    • Usually these type of conversations happen in my head.
      Its a big step that they are floating someone where in cell phone space. I probably should be scared.

  2. I’m sending a postage paid package for you to send me your phone. 😛

  3. A conversation you think only happens in the movies.

  4. ryoko861 said:

    OH! You were texting and driving?

    How the hell do you do that? I can’t even talk while driving.

    I SO need a keyboard when I text. I only have the keypad style. With a keyboard I could text all day!

    We all need friends like VB! Can’t talk about that kind of stuff with just ANYBODY!

    • Red lights!! And shopping at Walmart.

      My phone has the keyboard like an actual computer keyboard.
      I am honored to be VB’s friend. She is the coolest stripper I know!

  5. I need more stripper friends. I mean a stripper friend. And gay friends. I need more gay friends. Could you imagine the text conversation between your stripper friend and gay friend. I would be the boring one.

  6. I get some of my best posts from text convos with my bff. Hilarious!

  7. Velvet Bunny said:

    Your conversations never annoy me sugar. But my shift was about to start and you know there’s no where to hide my phone. 😉
    Love you sweetie.

  8. You are so funny, and that is crazy that your friends name is ‘Velvet Bunny.’ I told my managers that if they ever made me change my name I’d change it to a stripper name, like, well, ‘Bambi.’ I love the texts, and definitely love those kind of conversations you stumble upon and ‘what if’ scenarios.

  9. Ashley Lopez said:


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