I am self diagnosing my self with bi polar or schizophrenia. I will try each one out and see what works best with me.
What? Why are you looking at me like that?
The only really I say that is because someone has to be off their rocker. Either me or my iPod. With every random song that comes on, I feel like I change as well. Like I turn into the person that would normally like that music.
See I ain’t no asshole. I am really am serious. My iPod (or maybe even me! Gasp!) has a serious problem.
That and I am also very gulliable and influential. I wanna be everything and do everything that I see or hear.
ON with the list so you can see what I mean:
Here Comes the Sun-The Beatles
I actually feel like a bumble bee when I hear this song. A bubble bee flying around from flower to flower in the sun. The feel of the sunshine is just so nice. This may be attributed to me watching the Bee Movie a hundred times when it came out. Thank you kids. I will forever be scarred!
Here For the Party- Gretchen Wilson
I channel my female red-neck at this moment. Because female red-necks are always here for the party and will not leave til someone throws them out. Kinda like me at Sams Club. I guess it does get old staying and hitting up the sample booths over and over. What?! They are FREE!
Hey Joe- Jimi Hendrix
I have to take acid to enjoy this song. I just do. Do you have any to spare? Come man, hit me up! I NEED MY FIX!
Hillbilly Bone-Blake Shelton
This song transforms me like the way the Hulk does. I am normal. The Shelton’s smooth voice starts working me up. Then the key words: We all gotta a hillybone down deep inside …. you can’t keep but hollaring Yee Haw. Well I start making my own moonshine! And the sudden urge to buy wrangler jeans hits me like a sound of a bell! Then you gotta just shake that romp roast! Then there is my southern accent. Once I hear that then I become attracted to myself!
How do you like me now? – The Heavy
Ok I first heard this song on a commercial for Kia. OK so loving a song so much was not a good reason for buying two Kia’s and putting us into debt. Hello! That’s what marketing is all about. To trick people. I did good!
I Am Not a Robot- Marina & the Diamonds
I get this all the time. Are you a rebot from the future? Do you have any robotic features? Are you related to Paulie’s robot in the movie Rocky 4? To clarifty once and for all, just because I do the robot while I am talking all nonchallantly by no one means I am a robot. I can channel robots through my robotic mind powers but that’s about it.
I Get Around- Beach Boys
Hell yeah I do! They call me the Sun City Tramp-a-roo. You should see me go in electric mobility scooter that I stole from some old woman in Wal-Mart. Let me tell you, that thing gots balls!
8 Days a Week- Beatles
Ok. I want to move to England. In England their whole calendar is different. Who knows what else is different? If they have eight days instead of our measly 7, that totally rocks my socks! I so wanna be British! The British calendar is the way to go! They might even have 14 months. Certainly not 13 cause that’s the Devil’s number. I just hope the 8th day is added to the weekend and not the weekday. That would totally suck!
I Know You Want Me- Pit Bull
It’s so fucking obvious. I’m hot! I’m PHAT! You know you all want me you filthy people. But you can’t handle the truth … er I mean me.
I Think I’m Paranoid- Garbage
I Seriously DO! I am freaking out all the time! I think the government is conspiring against us! There are aliens among us! Are these walls closing in?! Spamalot is real!
Ahhhh, the voices! Oh wait that’s just the radio.