In the room where I sleep … my thoughts overflow.

Whoopee dee do

I am jealous of this homeless man.

Ok maybe I should explain why. That’s a hell of a statement for you to handle, I’m sure.

This homeless man was discovered!

The Columbus Discovery posted a video  interview with this man, Ted Williams, whom despite being homeless has a remarkable voice.

The man with the “golden voice” gave us a side story of his life at the time of the interview:

When I was 14 I kind of listened to one of our area radio announcers, and I went as a field trip to go meet the guy, and he looked nothing like what he sounded like. So I asked him about that, and he said to me, “listen, radio is defined — theater of mind.” And so when he said “theater of mind,” I just said, well, hey. I can’t be an actor, I can’t be an on-air personality, but the voice just became something of a development over the years and I went to school for it.

And then alcohol and drugs and a few other things became a part of my life. I’ve got two years clean, and I’m trying hard to get it back. And hopefully somebody from one of these television or radio stations will say, ‘hey, I need a voice-over,’ or ‘ I need something.’

 

Oh well, right? We all have dreams. I wanted to be the next Janet/Britney/Ani Defranco. I also wanted to be Katie Couric or that Asian reporter. Her name escapes my mind at the moment. We can’t have it all right? This is real life! Not a fairy tale!

WRONG!

Thanks to his little interview that was posted on You-tube obviously making it top rated (pfft!),  he is no longer homeless or jobless.

Groan!

The Cleveland Cavaliers have offered him a job and a home. Someone throw me a bone, will ya!

Now, the “radio man” has gotten lots of offers and tons of goodwill: Before the Cavs, made their bid, the station said a group of credit unions offered Williams a contract worth up to $10,000; a caller claiming to rep MTV expressed interest in having him guest-announce a show; and callers who said they were the voiceover actors behind plugs for “The Simpsons” and “Entertainment Tonight” said they wanted him to compete on their upcoming “America’s Next Voice” — where the prize includes a home studio.

Well whoopee dee doo.

I am happy for the guy. Homeless is not better off then what I have. I am certainly not ungrateful …. for that.  But damnit, I am ungrateful that my talents have not been discovered. Hello Spurs? Hello Kings? Anybody?  I can roll my tongue. I talk so fast sometimes you can’t understand me sometimes. Hell, sometimes you can’t understand what I write.

That’s something right?

Right?

I need a hug. And some of the 350 million from last nights lotto.

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Comments on: "Whoopee dee do" (14)

  1. Don’t worry, you’ll be realized for your talents! Rolling your tongue is really cool, all I can do is wiggle my ears pretty much. You already have a captivated audience reading your blog, which can be half the fun right there, having people read what you write. I love the guy’s hair in the photo, it is just crazy fun!

    • You can wiggle your ear?!? Thats amazing. Tomorrow’s blog will now be about you tomorrow. Let me know if you get a mansion and E! anchor position.

  2. Awwwww that’s a feel good story though. GOOD FOR HIM!

    Hopefully they get him some new teeth too because Good God those are pretty bad.
    Okay I’ll stop now.

    • Dude you have made me laugh. Good point … good dental is needed. However, he will mostly be doing radio and voices, so it wont really matter. Unless he wants to get laid of course.

  3. I think it’s Connie Chung you were referring to, right? There…I threw you a bone. It may not be the one you wanted but it’s something. That’s what friends are for, right?

    LOL. Well, I think you’d made a great Connie Chung/ Katie Couric, etc. I think you’d made a better advice columnist though. You could tell all the stupid people to go to hell and the world would be a better place. if nothing else, it would give us all something hilarious to read.

    • Your right … cause Maury is her man. Imagine that life. Getting the deet on all those women getting 50 million DNAs as they search for the father of their baby.
      Talk about journalism right there!
      I would tell the stupid to go to hell but then we wouldnt have shows like Jerseyshore or Bad Girls Club. There is a sacrifice in everything.

  4. I’d always wished I had Movie Announcer Guy’s Voice when I was growing up. It was just so damn cool.

    Alas, I cannot even tolerate the sound of my voice on any recording device. And singing.. well let’s just say William Hung (a la American Idol Fail) is the next Julia Roberts by comparison. You know… if Julia was Asian and male.

    All I have is my writing, and sadly, those skills are so rusty I require updated tetanus shots.

    Cool story, though. 🙂

    Some day…

  5. TSA stopped Ted Williams from getting on his flight from Columbus to NYC. No appearance on “The Today Show” on Thursday morning. No visit to 92 year-old Mom in Brooklyn. See, he didn’t have ‘proper ID’, said the TSA. So Ted spent today at the Columbus Courthouse, trying to figure out how to get a copy of his birth certificate. Obviously he did have some form of ID, but the TSA wasn’t satisfied with it. OK – What are we going to do about this out-of-control phony security dance? These blockheads, however, are typical of our society. Follow the little rule book, and throw common sense out the window. Wrong. No little rule book takes away YOUR OBLIGATION TO THINK FOR YOURSELF. There are times you have to make an exception. That’s “the exception that proves the rule”. It’s like the traffic cop giving the mother of the little girl in a coma in Las Vegas a ‘jaywalking ticket’ – gave it to her right in the hospital. Or the policeman giving a ticket to the Dad who raced to the hospital while his wife’s water broke in the car on the way to the hospital in New Hampshire. RETRAIN EVERYBODY — OR FIRE THEM.

    • I have decided to be a prick for New Years so I say fire them. I might take more money or time to retrain …. and I am just too lazy.

    • Sorry to intrude but I TOTALLY agree with you! My husband’s ID card had expired and he didnt have his license… he stops in at 7-11 and buys a 6 pack .. the cashier says “I need to see your ID” – so My hubby pulls out the ID card and the cashier says “This is expired I cant sell you the alcohol” .. My husband flipped he told the guy “its obvious its a real ID card and I’m obviously old enough to purchase the beer” The cashier refused so my hubby left and purchased it elsewhere .. but I tell ya ..

  6. Uh I hate stupid ppl. I would love a break like this golden voice dude. I could sure use a second job rift now lol

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