Example: Your friend asks you : Do you like my new hair cut?
It’s hideous! Her barber should be shot and then hanged. He assaulted her hair! Her hair was raped and ravished!
Yes! , you exclaim. It brings out your eyes. Your friend goes away very happy. You might call these white lies because they are little lies to avoid hurting people’s feelings. But if you white lie, it is still just a lie.
After much thought, I think we should start telling the truth. What if we hurt someone’s feelings? That will be the case, but after awhile, people will stop hiding behind the lies that they want to hear and just ACCEPT IT! Everyone now join hands and embrace the truth. Do you feel it? Yes, it’s very warm and fuzzy like a teddy bear.
Scenario One happened to my yesterday. And of course I lied. But next time, I am going to be honest.
Mother: Your father and I are going on a diet tomorrow. We need to cut sugar from our diet. Do you think I am fat?
What I should have said: I don’t think, I know. Hence the reason you’re going on a diet.
There my mother confirmed the obvious already. I basically just pointed it out that she knew the answer to her own question. She knows the truth. Don’t make me the bad guy. You must be fat to be going on a diet! Trick question!
Scenario Two happens to me all the time. I hate the question How are you? Cause I always answer the same: Fine. Great. Wonderful. The honest retort to that if you are me is: “Do you really wanna know? Ok then, I am shitty. I didn’t sleep at all cause all my kids decided to sleep on my side of the bed. Not Gus’s but mine! So I slept on my right shoulder the whole night. I am in pain! Woke up late because of that, so I really didn’t get to my hair this morning. Hence the frizzy fro you see. I have pimples on my chin like I am in the 8th grade. I just realized that the pants I put on today were dirty and have stains. I only have one earing on. My contact is killing my right eye so if I wink at you I am not trying to get lucky. I started my monthly curse so I am tired and pissy and very hungry. When I got in the office I need to create files for the boss stat and he was impatiently asking every three minutes where they are. I spilled this jelly donut on my shirt. And someone took the last cup of coffee. Wanna ask me another dumb question?”
Not only when they salute your honesty but they might never ask you again how you are! Double win!
Scenario Two needs to be done with tact. Honesty is a virtue. Remember that.
Boss: Marina, I need that summary of the report for the month. Where is it? When will you have it?
Marina: I am working on it now. I will get it to you as soon as I am done.
Boss: Ok well I need it like now! Not yesterday or tomorrow but now.
Marina: Ok, sir. If I may, it’s impossible to give it to you yesterday. I just now found out about this report. And its impossible to give it to you tomorrow because well I work here and not in a time machine factory. Today is today. And if you want it done correctly and instantly, I say you leave me alone for thirty minutes to let me get it done. If you want something crappy, give me a second and I will pull something outta my ass for you. With all due respect sir. <—– See how I added that last bit? Tact!