Something about this weather makes me sad. It’s been happening since as long as I remember. I just get sad as the weather gets colder.
As of today, it’s officially fall. And I feel really bummed. And I have nothing to be bummed about at all. I actually just got sad yesterday. I was here at work working (lol) and I remember I was not thinking of anything. I was concentrating on what was on the computer. And then it was like something passed before me and I became sad. Not depressed, no grief, just sad. Bummed.
And it got better as I went home but then again today I feel it. Something about the weather changing or that its no longer happy summer maybe. I can’t be for certain. I just know I feel bummed. Then this fatigued feeling comes out of nowhere. Like as if being cold is tiring. Today its a bit cold. Like I said fall has officially started. And now that I thinking about it, it was in the cold weather that I would break up with my boyfriends that I had in high school. Just cause I just felt sad and they were not making me happy. However, Gus walked into the office right now to give me some paper work and seeing him filled me a light-heartedness. Like a split second I had a spring in my step. But now he is gone and all I want to do now is go home and get into my bed under my sheets and sleep. Sleep always makes me feel good. I would just love for me and the kids to go home and get into the covers and just sleep.
Too bad I have to cook two meals. One for the family and one for the lunch bunch.
I like the lunch bunch. I LOVE the food. Just sometimes you know when you just want to be by yourself. And I made this commitment thing. I keep thinking to myself that I’ll only do this thing for a while. I miss being by myself during lunch. Even if I had to struggle during lunch at least I was by myself. In my warm car. Warmness!!!