This Just In: Mondays are More Depressing than We Thought

I cursed the day this morning. As soon as I heard the alarm, I heard the most horrible livid words come spewing out of my mouth. Me? The Saint. I know right? I am just as surprised as you. Mother fucking Monday ruining my day. Mondays make it hard for a me to smile. In [...]

Thursday Movie Review- Hello? Anybody? Hello Hello!

In 31 days its going to be 2012!!! Do you know what that means?? Not only does my license expire that year and I will have to experience the hell that is the DMV, but also it may possibly be the end of the world or something really badass! The Mayans predicted the world to [...]

Revisiting the Smart Car…. That Still Sucks.

Over the weekend I ran to the store and as I was walking in I saw parked up front a smart car. Awwwwwww am I right?? However, I got angry! My Tahoe could have used that space!!! Notice how the smart car is this tiny thing in this space!!! You could fit five Smart cars [...]

What’s The Deal With the New England Area

I recently saw this movie, A Haunting in Connecticut. Of course it freaked me out totally… I am totally chicken to supernatural movies. It supposedly is based on a true story. If you read the “actual” account, the family claims they were extremely tormented by the entities that lived in the house. The oldest son [...]

My 27 year Old Melt Down- Saturn Noooooo!!

This is not promotion that my birthday is coming up. No not at all. (September 8)   That would be shameless  promotion. The point is that I am turning 27!!  Forget the fact that I am three years away from 30! The big deal is that I could die!!! Gulp!! And by default I am automatically enrolled [...]

Singing the Monday Blues

Just so you know: You cannot put the car in reverse without it being actually on. Yeah… it’s already that kind of Monday. This retardness on my part is a fine example of why there should not even be weekend. I end up forgetting how to function on a regular work day. In fact, even as I [...]

Shit You Should Definetely Know

Shit You Should Definitely Know 1. I actually spelled definitely right for the first time ever! 2. This is how I make my coffee at work. Because it is made with like 16 full scoops of coffee for a 12 cups pot I use half a cup of water, 5 creamers and 5 packets of sugar.  Always [...]

I Don’t Do Hitler!

Today I kind of wanted to make fun of religion in general. I have a bunch of ideas so if this sounds all,umm, 2nd graderish (?), I apologize. Since Easter is like 4 days away, I figured people would need some insight in saving their soul. Ok not exactly insight. Then mindless drivel inforation I thought [...]

Missing in Las Vegas

It was a cold and dreary night in the god forsaken town. I was at my usual place Barney’s Pub doing my usual thing. Downing a couple of glasses of my favorite whiskey, Hiram Walker. I was on the job. I was always on the job. Tomorrow I would be heading to Las Vegas, the [...]

I Am A [insert bad word here} Rockstar!

Yesterday my good blogger friend bestowed onto me a bad ass award. Ahem, I am now the Queen of the Fuckin Nile! No Way? Way! Wait what … Not the Queen of the fuckin Nile? Did I lose again? They gave to who? Mother Theresa! Damnit! Always a fucking bridesmaid! No the award I did win was this. [...]